


Flashback

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Ficlet, Reader Insert, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-11
Updated: 2016-06-11
Packaged: 2018-07-14 12:44:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7172033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompts: “I know, isn’t it great?”</p>
<p>Summary: You and Sam were childhood friends but haven’t seen each other since he left for Stanford. You two meet during a hunt and relive some of your best childhood memories.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Flashback

 

**YOUR POV**

You were at an abandoned barned during the night and you were looking down at who you thought was the werewolf that has been terrorizing the town. His hair was trembling with fear, he begged for mercy.

 

“I swear, I don’t know what you’re talking about,” The monster cried out.

 

You aimed your gun at the beast and just when you were about to fire your silver bullet a man from behind you yelled. 

 

“WAIT! He’s telling the truth.”

 

You turned your back to the man, to your surprise it was your childhood best friend, Sam Winchester.

 

“Sam?”

 

“Y/N?” he looked at you, surprised as well.

 

His brother, Dean, stood beside him with a .45 caliber in his hand.

 

“That guy’s innocent.” Dean said to you, lowering his gun. “Try cutting him with a silver knife. He’s not a werewolf.”

 

You lightly cut his wrist with the silver blade from your back pocket. The wound just bled like a normal person’s would.

 

“Dammit.” you muttered under your breath.  

 

You bolted out the barn, irritated. You’ve been trying to track down that werewolf for weeks. It never left a solid trail for you to follow and once you had a lead, it was a bust. The guy you assumed was a werewolf was just another ordinary human.

 

The two brothers followed you outside.

 

“What was that about? You could’ve shot an innocent man.” Dean asked.

 

You looked at him, annoyed, “I was so sure he was the werewolf that’s been killing the townspeople,” you told him, turning your back.

 

“It’s okay,” Sam said putting his hand on your left shoulder, “if you want, Dean and I can help you hunt the werewolf.”

 

You lifted his hand from your shoulder and looked up at him. It’s been so long since you’ve seen him. You shared your whole childhood together. You travelled around america hunting monsters together with your dad, John and his kids.

 

“It’s nice to see you again, Sam,” you said with a small smile.

 

He smiled back at you and pulled you into a warm hug. It was great to be back in his arms. The last time you two were together was the day before Sam left for Stanford, you two were sitting by the impala with ice cream instead of your usual beer. 

 

Dean approached both of you, “Woah, cut the lovey-dovey crap. Let’s discuss this werewolf problem back at the motel room at 51st street,” he said breaking you and Sam apart and went straight to his car.

 

Sometimes Dean could get jealous. He was always after you when you were younger. Whenever you weren’t hanging out with Sam, he would always flirt with you, but you kept on rejecting him.

 

“It’s nice to see you too, Dean,” you said, chuckling a bit.

 

“Well then, let’s go,” Sam said as he walked towards the black impala that was parked a few feet away.  

 

“You comin’?” Dean asked with his head peaking out from the car’s window.

 

“It will be just like old times,” Sam said, trying to convince you to ride with them.

 

Sam surely remembered all the good memories you had in the impala but all you could remember were the annoying 12 hour cramped road trips.

 

“Just like old times? I think I’ll pass,”you said.

 

You walked towards your own car and put your arm on it’s hood. You look at it and and then at the impala, “Besides, can’t leave my baby. Surely my ‘61 Jaguar E is faster than that rusty old piece of metal.”

 

Dean gasps, “No one talks about my baby that way.”

 

“Really think so, huh.” Sam said.

 

You nod your head once. You knew what was coming. Sam and Dean look at each other at the same time.

 

“Race? It’s the moetel a couple streets down,” they asked looking at you with a smug smile.

 

“Oh it’s on.” You ran to your car quickly started the engine and drove off.

 

You could hear both car’s muffler rumbling furiously. You were at 100mph but the Winchesters were going faster. 

 

You suddenly remembered one time when you were only 16 years old. Your parents were on an extremely dangerous hunt so they left you with the Winchesters. Sam was teaching you how to race. That day your goal was to beat Dean.

 

_ “What’s this gear for?” you asked Sam who was sitting on the passenger’s seat of the car. _

 

_ He smiled at you and put his hand on your nervous hand, “That is the fourth gear. You can use this when Dean is ahead of you. Just put the stick here and you can surely pass him.” _

 

_ “Okay, I got it.” _

 

_ The feeling of his smooth hand on your skin made the butterflies in your stomach flutter. You never wanted moments like that to end, but sadly all of them do.  _

 

_ Ever since you were 7yrs. old you had a crush on Sam, but you were just too much of a coward to tell him. Years passed and you’ve learned to put aside these emotions, but in times when he was helping you or simply just being there, you couldn’t resist.  _

 

_ Your cheeks turned into a bright shade of pink as you lifted your hand from the driving stick. You turn your head to the right to look at him. His eyes were so full of pride. _

 

_ “I know you can do this. I believe in you,” he said. _

 

You won that race against Dean by half a second and it’s only now that Dean gets the chance to redeem himself. 

 

Remembering Sam’s words of comfort, you press on the clutch and shift to the fourth gear. You zoom pass the impala with the speed of 150 mph.The impala’s maximum speed was 130 mph and Dean couldn’t even reach that speed.

 

You’ve never felt this much adrenaline in your life, not even when you were in the middle of a fight with a monster. Sam Winchester, Street racing, this was probably the highest your adrenaline level could get.

 

Your car drifted into the dimmed parking lot of the motel. As you came to a full stop, you got out of your car and leaned against its side. You’ve beat Dean again and this time you beat him by 5 seconds.

 

The impala drove right next to where your was parked. You wanted to rub it in that you won again so you walked to the driver’s side of the car. Dean came out frowning and avoiding you.

 

“Hey, that was a fair game,” you said, hoping he won’t stay upset at you forever.

 

Sam stood beside you shaking his head and both of you just looked at Dean who was already entering their room.

 

Dean didn’t like losing, even when you were teenagers. The first time you beat him at racing, he didn’t talk to you for a week. You hoped this wasn’t like one of those times.

 

“You know how Dean is, I’m sure he’ll get over by tomorrow,” Sam said, still looking at the scrappy wooden door of the motel room from the parking lot.

 

“Well, umm, you two get some rest and I’ll rent a room of my own for the next few days,” you said.

 

“It was nice seeing you again,” he said, bending his back to give you a kiss on the cheek.

 

He followed Dean into their motel room and you were left there feeling so helpless. Helplessness wasn’t something you liked feeling. You couldn’t move an inch of your muscle. You didn’t know if it was a weakness, but god, anything Sam does makes you feel so, so powerless.   

 

You rented your own room and retired for the night. You couldn’t sleep at all. All you could think of was Sam. Sometimes you felt stupid for not confessing your feelings to him when you were younger.

 

**Sam’s POV**

 

It’s been around 10 years since I last saw Y/N, I guess I can say I’ve missed her. It was stupid to kiss her on the cheek. I shouldn’t have done that. It brought back some memories. Y/N made it clear before that she didn’t share the same feelings but seeing her again made everything feel so much better.

 

I walked in our motel room to see Dean on one of the beds with a lycanthropy book in his hand.

 

He lowered the book down to look at me with a smug smirk, “so… Y/N.”

  
I tried to hide my smile but that didn’t work. I smiled and grabbed a cold bottle of beer from the mini fridge.

 

“I know! isn’t it great?” I said,”it’s been forever since we last seen her.”

 

Dean looked at me like I wasn’t telling the whole truth, i wasn’t. I could never tell Dean I like Y/N because ever since he learned how to flirt, he has been after her.

 

“Uhuh,” Dean said teasingly while shaking his head.

 

“It’s nothing.”

 

“You sure? So you would be okay if I hit on her?”

 

“Sure. Whatever. I don’t care. Why would I care? It’s okay.” I said nervously.

 

Just like I said, ever since he learned how to flirt, he has been after her.

 

“Okay,” Dean said doubtfully.

 

A few hours later after some research, I was in bed trying to fall asleep, but I couldn’t. Dean and Y/N together? It was something I didn’t like to think about. If only I wasn’t a coward a few years back, I could’ve told her what I felt.

 

I picked up a book similar to what Dean was reading earlier to research some more and get my mind of things. Still, everything I read reminded me of Y/N. No one had this much effect on me.

 

Flipping through the pages of the book, I came across the story of how Lucifer fell. A few years back, I had no soul. A year later, Dean got my soul back, but it came from Lucifer’s cage so it was tortured. I would hallucinate and see the devil  everywhere, sometimes even threaten me with things I love most. . . like Y/N.

 

_ “Sam! Come on!” Lucifer said, “just cut your wrists and I’ll let your girlfriend go free.” _

 

_ Lucifer had his arm around Y/N neck and she was struggling to go free. If I kill myself, he would let her be, but if I don’t, she might die and I don’t want that blood on my hands. We lost Cas, we even lost Bobby. _

 

_ I picked up the knife and just before it dug into my skin, I heard something crack. I look up to see Y/N on the floor, lifeless. The devil just snapped her neck. _

 

_ “NO!” I screamed, rushing to her and cradling Y/N in my arms on the ground.  _

 

_ “Oops, my hand must’ve slipped.” Lucifer said, looking down at me. _

 

_ I was crying silently. I let her head rest on my shoulder as I stroked her hair. _

 

_ “I’m sorry,” I said softly, “I love you and I always have.” _

 

_ I’ve said I love you and now she is gone. I have to live with this constant pain knowing it’s my fault and that I could’ve done something to save her. _

 

_ Dean ran in from the back door of where I was and ran to  me. _

_  
_ _“Hey, hey, it’s not real, it’s not real,” he said putting his hands on my back._

 

_ I looked up at him and suddenly, everything disappeared. Her body wasn’t there. Satan wasn’t smiling from a distance. It was just me and Dean alone. _

 

Everything was just in my head.

 

That day I realized I would do anything for her, even die for her,I love her. I want to tell her but the problem is I can’t get the words out of my mouth. The last time I tried to tell Y/N my real feeling was when I was about to leave for Stanford and that didn’t end well.

* * *

 

**Your POV**

 

A few days later, we finally ganked the bastard that was taking the hearts of the townspeople. Can you believe that he was doing it for sport? He was in full control over himself when he murdered those people. 

 

“How ‘bout we go get ice cream?” Dean suggested.

 

“Ice cream? Wow that’s new,” you say surprised.

 

Whatever time of the day it is, beer and a burger is the only thing Dean likes to eat.

 

“Well then you go buy it,” Sam said looking at Dean.

 

“Nah, I’m too lazy. You and Y/N should just go out and buy a tub of ice cream and I,” Dean said lying down on the motel room’s bed, “will wait here.”

 

He winks at Sam for a reason you do not know of and Sam just looks at you.

 

“Umm, sure, okay. I’ll go get my car,” you say, getting your keys.

 

You two argue about whose car you’re taking for about a minute and in the end, you took the jaguar e.

 

* * *

 

You put the tub of vanilla ice cream in the second row of the car as you got in the driver’s seat and Sam got two separate cones just for you two. You looked at the tub of cold delicious sweetness, recalling a memory from long ago, the day before Sam left for Stanford.

 

_ “Thanks for the ice cream,” you said, raising your ice cream cone. _

 

_ “No problem. Uhmm, listen, Y/N, I wanna tell you something,” Sam said nervously. _

 

_ “So do I,” you said. _

 

_ You were planning on telling Sam that you loved him and this seemed like the perfect time for you to do that. _

 

_ You looked at him and smiled, “You go first.” _

 

_ “Okay,” his hands started fidgeting.  _

 

_ You wondered what he was going to say. _

 

_ He took a deep breath and said, “I’m leaving for Stanford.” _

 

_ Your eyes grew big and you were full of shock, “What?” _

 

_ “I can’t take it anymore. Dad’s forcing me to continue the family business and I just can’t do that.” _

 

_ You looked at him teary eyed. Sam was probably the most important person in your life and now he was about to leave you just when you were about to tell him you loved him. It hurt, it hurt so much. Your parents would never let you leave either so you can’t go with Sam.  You stood up from the sidewalk and ran back home so fast, you dropped the ice cream cone Sam gave you. _

 

_ You couldn’t think at all. Ever since your boyfriend cheated on you, you found it hard to love again and then you fell in love with your bestfriend and just like that, he is gone. _

 

_ The next day, Dean told you about the news. Sammy was gone. The boy you loved was gone.  _

 

Sam approached you with two ice cream cones in his hands, “Are you okay?” he said, giving you one of the waffle cones.

 

“Yah, I’m good.” You paused for a moment if you think you should say anything to him about that day. “Sam,” you looked at him in the eyes and said, “I’m sorry for running from you the day before you left home.”

 

You look down on your lap with shame. You regretted leaving Sam alone on the sidewalk.

 

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m guessing it was my fault anyway. I should’ve told you sooner. But what was that thing you wanted to tell me about?” he said lifting your head up and looking at you, smiling.

 

You looked back at him and said, “I went after you in Stanford to tell you. ‘Had to leave home forever ‘cause if I left Dad said I’m never come back. I even got baby just so that I can drive all the way there.”

 

“You didn’t have to do that, you could have just told me on the phone.”

 

“What I wanted to tell you couldn’t be said over the phone.”

 

“You can tell me now,” he said.

 

“Okay don’t laugh.”

 

You had to act like everything was okay. I have to act like you don’t care anymore even if you do.

 

“I promise I won’t,” Sam said

 

“I wanted to say I love you, but then I saw you talking to some other girl so-” he laughed a bit.

 

“Hey! I said don’t laugh,” you said frowning with a death glare.

 

God, you were so stupid. You shouldn’t have told him. Now you just looked pathetic.

 

“I’m sorry. It’s just that, I was talking to Jess because she said I looked sad then I told her about my problem.”

 

“What problem?” you asked, confused.

 

“I love you,” he said, looking at you then at your lips.

 

You were shocked. God, now you really do look pathetic.

 

“You said that in present tense,” you said, more like a question than a statement.

 

“Yah,” Sam said leaning back against the seat and looking ahead instead of at you. “By any chance, do you still love me?”

 

“Does this answer your question?”

 

He looks at you and probably expected a kiss, but instead you dabbed his nose with some ice cream. You laugh at him and so does he.

 

“I’m gonna take that as a yes.” he said, grinning from ear to ear while wiping of the ice cream.

 

“Yah,” you said.

 

And suddenly every problem you’ve ever faced seemed like nothing. You overcame your fear and told him and it turns out, you shared the same feelings. If only you told him sooner.

 

You came back to the motel room as a couple and told Dean about everything that happened over some more ice cream.

 

He says you guys should form a threesome with him, but you got the sense that Dean was just joking. Apparently, he only flirted with you so that Sam could get jealous, man up and tell you how he felt the whole time. How sweet.

 

From then on, you three hunted together. You faced Crowley, Metatron, the mark of cain and even the darkness.

  
  


**_A/N: Reminder! If you love someone, make sure to tell them. You shouldn’t have to wait for years to pass._ **

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
